at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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