i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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