May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
