Your tits are I can't wait for
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i drank out of a bidet.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
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