You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
