hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
