I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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