covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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