what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
i came on her dog
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
