these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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