Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
