Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize