We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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