I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
