me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
