Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
