If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
