we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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