i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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