thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
She is in my trunk
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Best friends brother. Beat that.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
