I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
