If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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