Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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