worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
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