Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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