Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
