I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
