I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
