I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize