Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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