I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
