period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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