She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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