Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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