How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
