Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
