Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
