and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
