That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
