i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
