69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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