Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
