Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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