so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
