You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
