OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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