Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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