I'm eating all of the evidence.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
