is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
