Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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